The Road to Wrestlemania continues with a pretty lame lineup for Elimination Chamber 2017.
DOLPH ZIGGLER v. APOLLO CREWS and KALISTO (Handicapped Match)
The premise of this match is ridiculous. We look forward to the ascension of Apollo Crews, but we think the writers want Ziggler to win. We pick Ziggler.
NIKKI BELLA v. NATALYA
They are trying to bring back Bella. We pick Bella.
SMACK DOWN TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS
We’re going with a dark horse – American Alpha
RANDY ORTON v. LUKE HARPER
RKO just won the ROYAL RUMBLE, as we predicted. They can’t possibly have him now lose to Harper, can they?! We pick RKO.
BECKY LYNCH v. MICKIE JAMES
They are trying to bring back Mickie James, also. We pick Mickie.
ELIMINATION CHAMBER – MAIN EVENT
Let’s go Cena – Cena sucks. We pick Cena.
The show began with Daniel Bryan, saying that his Intercontinental Championship would mean even more if he were to defend it. Bad News Barrett and Sheamus then threatened Bryan. The crowd chanted, “You look stupid” towards Sheamus. Dolph Ziggler then emerged to save the day. But Big Show then came out and said that his victory in the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal meant that he had “eclipsed” Andre the Giant in history, and proves that he had surpassed anything that Andre the Giant had ever been. This set up for a six man Tag Team match at the Main Event.
Continue reading THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – April 9, 2015 (Dallas, TX)
RAW BRAWDCAST – April 6, 2015 (Austin, TX)
Michael Cole is still absent from his Lesnar “injury” (translation: he’s on vacation), but JBL returned after unspecified “surgery” (he’s not on vacation). Byron Saxton filled in. Continue reading RAW BRAWDCAST – April 6, 2015 (Austin, TX)
The Fallout Show, after Wrestlemania, opened with (Good Evening Ladies and Gentleman, my name is) Paul Heyman advocating for the FORMER reigning, defending, undisputed WWE World Heavyweight Champion, Brock Lensar. He said that Lesnar almost respects Roman Reigns, but that Seth Rollins, the CURRENT reigning, defending . . . is “slimy.” Heyman threatened litigation, but stated that his client was against it because “all lawyers are scumbags.” A rematch of Rollins and Lesnar was set to be the Main Event. Continue reading RAW BRAWDCAST – MARCH 30, 2015 (San Jose, CA)
In the Battle Royal, Big Show prevailed. The Giant won Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal. But we’ll find out on Monday Night Raw what the future is for The Miz and Mizdow. When The Miz ordered his personal assistant, Mizdow, to leave the ring, Mizdow rebelled and eliminated The Miz. Mizdow was the last man eliminated from the Battle Royal. It would have been a miracle if Mizdow won, but JBL said that, “Miracles don’t work with Giants.” We’re not sure what that means. The Creative Team has some drama – perhaps a feud – planned for The Miz and Mizdow. Continue reading WRESTLEMANIA XXXI – March 29, 2015 (Santa Clara, CA)
RAW BRAWDCAST – March 23, 2015 (Los Angeles, CA)
Sting opened the show. Stephanie McMahon stepped in the ring to taunt him, telling him that dogs are stupid and he is “nothing but a face painted freak.” Sting caught Stephanie McMahon’s hand as she was trying to slap him. Triple H approached with his trademark sledgehammer as Sting swung his trademark bat in the ring. The confrontation never happened, but suspense was built in anticipation of their match at Wrestlemania. Apparently, this is the Seniors’ Section because the combined ages of these two wrestlers is over 100. Will it be sponsored by Geritol? Continue reading RAW BRAWDCAST – March 23, 2015 (Los Angeles, CA)
The show began with Roman Reigns talking to the crowd. Thankfully, it was short because Mark Henry (with two first names) entered the ring. Henry said he’s putting all his money on Reigns to beat Brock Lesnar. Out came Kane and Seth Rollins, with briefcase in hand, and J&J Security at his side. Rollins claimed that J&J Security had secured the ring so that Randy Orton won’t show up. Continue reading THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – March 19, 2015 (Kansas City, MO)
The first segment had a canned interview with Randy Orton, proudly saying how he set up Seth Rollins last week. Then, Rollins (flanked by J&J Security), Big Show, and Kane were in the ring listening to Rollins complain about Orton’s betrayal. He accused The Viper of being sociopathic. In a moment of transparent insincerity combined with poor acting, Big Show apologized to Rollins. This was followed by apologies from Kane and Jamie Noble. Joey Mercury was too sad – sniff, sniff – to apologize. Continue reading RAW BRAWDCAST – March 16, 2015 (Des Moines, Iowa)
Smackdown started with Daniel Bryan acknowledging how he didn’t make it to the main event at Wrestlemania. Bryan said he wrestled some of the best WWE superstars – Mr. Perfect, Bret Hart, Randy Savage, and Ricky Steamboat, all who were Intercontinental Champions. He said the only WWE championship that he hadn’t won is the Intercontinental Championship. (He hasn’t won the Diva’s Championship either, even though he’s in the right weight class). He entered himself into the ladder match for the Intercontinental Championship at Wrestlemania. Continue reading THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – March 12, 2015 (Detroit, Michigan)
It began in Pittsburgh with The Authority supplicating to Randy Orton for reuniting with The Authority. Orton paid them back by insulting each one of them, and then defusing the situation by stating he was kidding. Continue reading RAW BRAWCAST – MARCH 9, 2015 (Pittsburgh, PA)