Tag: Kane

PREDICTIONS FOR WWE FASTLANE – 2016

OUR PICKS FOR WWE FASTLANE
 
Becky & Sasha v. Tamina & Naomi – We don’t care, but we note that Becky Lynch is the only female wrestler with talent and technique. WWE will surely blunder her talent.
 
Ziggler v. Owens – We predict The Bear. There will probably a near record of 2 counts against Ziggler, as usual.
 
Kalisto v. Del Rio – This is the US Championship? It’s on the Kickoff Show?! How far has the US Championship fallen? This is ludicrous. We hope they both lose and that the writers transfer this Championship to someone worthy. Does the phrase “Never Give Up” mean anything?
 
Charlotte v. Brie Bella – Charlotte is Rick Flair’s daughter. She doesn’t lose, in case you hadn’t noticed.
 
AJ Styles v. Jericho – We’re picking Styles. The want him to get over.
Big Show, Ryback, Kane v. Wyatt Family (minus Wyatt) – We’re picking the Wyatt Family. Perhaps setting up a Strouman match for Wrestlemania – against Lesnar?
 
Reigns, Ambrose, and Lesnar – There’s a reason that they stripped Ambrose of the Intercontinental Belt. He’ll probably be taken out in a stretcher early in the match, only to return, and win, when Lesnar is about to pin Reigns.
 

RAW BRAWDCAST – April 6, 2015 (Austin, TX)

RAW BRAWDCAST – April 6, 2015 (Austin, TX)

Michael Cole is still absent from his Lesnar “injury” (translation: he’s on vacation), but JBL returned after unspecified “surgery” (he’s not on vacation). Byron Saxton filled in.   Continue reading RAW BRAWDCAST – April 6, 2015 (Austin, TX)

RAW BRAWDCAST – MARCH 30, 2015 (San Jose, CA)

The Fallout Show, after Wrestlemania, opened with (Good Evening Ladies and Gentleman, my name is) Paul Heyman advocating for the FORMER reigning, defending, undisputed WWE World Heavyweight Champion, Brock Lensar. He said that Lesnar almost respects Roman Reigns, but that Seth Rollins, the CURRENT reigning, defending . . . is “slimy.” Heyman threatened litigation, but stated that his client was against it because “all lawyers are scumbags.” A rematch of Rollins and Lesnar was set to be the Main Event. Continue reading RAW BRAWDCAST – MARCH 30, 2015 (San Jose, CA)

THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – March 19, 2015 (Kansas City, MO)

The show began with Roman Reigns talking to the crowd.  Thankfully, it was short because Mark Henry (with two first names) entered the ring.  Henry said he’s putting all his money on Reigns to beat Brock Lesnar.  Out came Kane and Seth Rollins, with briefcase in hand, and J&J Security at his side.  Rollins claimed that J&J Security had secured the ring so that Randy Orton won’t show up.   Continue reading THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – March 19, 2015 (Kansas City, MO)

RAW BRAWDCAST – March 16, 2015 (Des Moines, Iowa)

The first segment had a canned interview with Randy Orton, proudly saying how he set up Seth Rollins last week. Then, Rollins (flanked by J&J Security), Big Show, and Kane were in the ring listening to Rollins complain about Orton’s betrayal. He accused The Viper of being sociopathic. In a moment of transparent insincerity combined with poor acting, Big Show apologized to Rollins. This was followed by apologies from Kane and Jamie Noble. Joey Mercury was too sad – sniff, sniff – to apologize. Continue reading RAW BRAWDCAST – March 16, 2015 (Des Moines, Iowa)

THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – March 5, 2015 (Washington, D.C.)

Smackdown started with Dolph Ziggler walking out with the new white and gold (or is it black and blue?) Intercontinental Belt.  Overactor Ziggler said that winning the Intercontinental Belt “changed his life.” Jerry the King Lawler called Bad News Barret another Kanye West. Luke Harper then attacked Ziggler and stopped BNB from taking  back his title. A brawl ensued between Ziggler, Barrett, Harper, and Dean Ambrose.  R-Truth took advantage of the distraction, slithered in the ring, and stole the Belt while no one was looking – no one but the cameras, audience, and announcers, that is.   Continue reading THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – March 5, 2015 (Washington, D.C.)

THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – February 26, 2015 (Atlanta, GA)

The show began with Daniel Bryan and his Yes! chant.  His first words were, “No. No. No.”  Eventually, the crowd chanted, “No, No, No.”  Bad News Barrett entered the ring, lamenting the fact that Dean Ambrose stole his Intercontinental Belt.  Dean Ambrose entered with the belt and attacked BNB.  Ambrose kept the stolen Belt. Continue reading THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – February 26, 2015 (Atlanta, GA)

LIFE IN THE WWE FASTLANE – February 22, 2015 (Memphis, TN)

The night began with a six man Tag Team match – Ziggler, Rowan, and Ryback wrestling Rollins, Kane, and Big Show – The Babyfaces vs. The Heels.

Announcer Michael Cole discussed the fact that these three Faces were previously terminated by The Authority, and stated that if you’re abused by the boss, you can go to Human Resources, but in the WWE, disputes are settled in the ring. Cole is absolutely right, except for the fact that the disputes and the matches are all fake in the WWE. Continue reading LIFE IN THE WWE FASTLANE – February 22, 2015 (Memphis, TN)

THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – February 19, 2015 (Fort Lauderdale, FL)

The show started with Daniel Bryan vs. The Miz.  The Miz claims to have “made” Daniel Bryan. Before the match, The Miz, acting like King Tut, told Mizdow, now his personal assistant, to retrieve an Egyptian cotton towel for him. The Miz submitted to Bryan (he threw in the towel) after a  Yes! lock. Continue reading THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – February 19, 2015 (Fort Lauderdale, FL)

THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – February 12, 2015 (Dayton, Ohio)

In the initial segment, Kane announced Tag Team Turmoil with Daniel Bryan and Roman Reigns as the initial Tag Team.  As he said that the Tag Teams would have to take the bull by the horns, El Torito (a midget in a bull costume) ran in and The Matadors grabbed him by his horns.

Continue reading THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – February 12, 2015 (Dayton, Ohio)