THE ROYAL RUMBLE – 2017
Below is the card, and our picks, for the 2017 Royal Rumble
SHEAMUS and CESARO v. The BULLET CLUB (GALLOWS and ANDERSON)
We are picking Sheamus and Cesaro, who are, pound for pound, the most boring Tag Team in WWE.
NIA JAX v. SASHA BANKS
We’re going with Sasha Banks – not for any particular reason. We really don’t care who wins.
BLISS/JAMES/NATALYA v. LYNCH/BELLA/NAOMI
We’re picking the heels – Bliss, James, and Natalya. And would Natalya still be wrestling if she weren’t a Hart?
RICH SWAN v. NEVILLE
Neville. They should reinvigorate the high-flying acrobat.
CHARLOTTE v. BAYLEY
The crowd loves Bayley, but you can never go wrong betting on Charlotte. She’s a Flair.
KEVIN OWENS v. ROMAN REIGNS
Roman Reigns is supposed to be a Face, but gets booed; that says enough. Reigns lacks talent, ability, technique, and can barely talk. Maybe, he can join BIG SHOW in retirement.
STYLES v. CENA
Let’s Go Cena. He’s overdue for a PPV victory. This should be the best match of the night.
THE MAIN EVENT – THE ROYAL RUMBLE
Some possible “unannounced” entrants – SHINSUKE NAKAMURA, FINN BAYLOR, SAMOA JOE, SHANE McMAHON, ZACH RYDER.
Our pick to win – RKO (outta nowhere).
The show began with Daniel Bryan, saying that his Intercontinental Championship would mean even more if he were to defend it. Bad News Barrett and Sheamus then threatened Bryan. The crowd chanted, “You look stupid” towards Sheamus. Dolph Ziggler then emerged to save the day. But Big Show then came out and said that his victory in the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal meant that he had “eclipsed” Andre the Giant in history, and proves that he had surpassed anything that Andre the Giant had ever been. This set up for a six man Tag Team match at the Main Event.
RAW BRAWDCAST – April 6, 2015 (Austin, TX)
Michael Cole is still absent from his Lesnar “injury” (translation: he’s on vacation), but JBL returned after unspecified “surgery” (he’s not on vacation). Byron Saxton filled in. Continue reading RAW BRAWDCAST – April 6, 2015 (Austin, TX)
The show began with repeat footage from Monday’s Fallout show – footage which was repeated several times on Monday Night RAW after it happened. Michael Cole and JBL allegedly had surgery from Lesna’r’s violent rage. But they’ll be back Monday. Which one will have a (fake) neck brace? Mike Phillips filled in for Michael Cole. Continue reading THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – April 2, 2015 (Fresno, CA)
The Fallout Show, after Wrestlemania, opened with (Good Evening Ladies and Gentleman, my name is) Paul Heyman advocating for the FORMER reigning, defending, undisputed WWE World Heavyweight Champion, Brock Lensar. He said that Lesnar almost respects Roman Reigns, but that Seth Rollins, the CURRENT reigning, defending . . . is “slimy.” Heyman threatened litigation, but stated that his client was against it because “all lawyers are scumbags.” A rematch of Rollins and Lesnar was set to be the Main Event. Continue reading RAW BRAWDCAST – MARCH 30, 2015 (San Jose, CA)
RAW BRAWDCAST – March 23, 2015 (Los Angeles, CA)
Sting opened the show. Stephanie McMahon stepped in the ring to taunt him, telling him that dogs are stupid and he is “nothing but a face painted freak.” Sting caught Stephanie McMahon’s hand as she was trying to slap him. Triple H approached with his trademark sledgehammer as Sting swung his trademark bat in the ring. The confrontation never happened, but suspense was built in anticipation of their match at Wrestlemania. Apparently, this is the Seniors’ Section because the combined ages of these two wrestlers is over 100. Will it be sponsored by Geritol? Continue reading RAW BRAWDCAST – March 23, 2015 (Los Angeles, CA)
The show began with Roman Reigns talking to the crowd. Thankfully, it was short because Mark Henry (with two first names) entered the ring. Henry said he’s putting all his money on Reigns to beat Brock Lesnar. Out came Kane and Seth Rollins, with briefcase in hand, and J&J Security at his side. Rollins claimed that J&J Security had secured the ring so that Randy Orton won’t show up. Continue reading THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – March 19, 2015 (Kansas City, MO)
Smackdown started with Daniel Bryan acknowledging how he didn’t make it to the main event at Wrestlemania. Bryan said he wrestled some of the best WWE superstars – Mr. Perfect, Bret Hart, Randy Savage, and Ricky Steamboat, all who were Intercontinental Champions. He said the only WWE championship that he hadn’t won is the Intercontinental Championship. (He hasn’t won the Diva’s Championship either, even though he’s in the right weight class). He entered himself into the ladder match for the Intercontinental Championship at Wrestlemania. Continue reading THE SMACK ON SMACKDOWN – March 12, 2015 (Detroit, Michigan)